Every time a phone rings I die a bit on the inside (idiots) wrote,
Every time a phone rings I die a bit on the inside


Background: The customer (who will be known as "Crackpot" from here on in) is experiencing some sort of weird activity on his computer... probably virus or spyware related and "SomeGuy" is going to be fixing it for him. Crackpot doesn't know who SomeGuy is and I'm the first person he's spoken to on the telephone since this issue started.

Things Crackpot told me:
- SomeGuy is fixing his computer online. He told him NOT to touch the computer and wait for him to post a message on his screen that it was fixed. So naturally, Crackpot didn't touch the computer, he only unplugged the modem.
- Crackpot has spent 4 days without sleep sitting near his computer that didn't have Internet access waiting for a message from SomeGuy. He didn't want to wait anymore so he called me to help.
- Crackpot built his own computer, so there is no manufacturer to refer him to.

What his computer is doing:
- The Yahoo Messenger icon (who will be known as Mr. Smiley from here on in) has turned evil.
- Mr. Smiley removed himself from the system tray and is holding his computer hostage.
- Mr. Smiley started to get red dots all over his face like he had the measels then he turned purple and started smoking cigarettes.
- Mr. Smiley finally stopped smoking and started to have a nic-fit. During this time he threatened to kill Crackpot if he turned off his computer. Mr. Smiley also threatened to delete everything off of his computer if he shut it down.
- 4 windows with glass doors appeared on the screen, Mr. Smiley ran into one and the guy locked him behind the door. "SomeWoman" (?) told him not to let Mr. Smiley out from behind the glass door or else!
- Crackpot accidentily let Mr. Smiley out of the locked door and he ran around threatening to kill him again.
- Mr. Smiley got tired, turned into a LittleMan and started sleeping in the system tray. Clicking on LittleMan doesn't make him wake up, it only makes him turn into a giant M for a few moments then return back to sleep.

So I did what every tech would do... I referred him to Microsoft!!!! Perhaps if they reload Windows he'll stop being attacked by Y!Messenger icons that have turned into a life of crime.

(x-posted to my regular journal, this one is too good to pass up!
  • Post a new comment


    default userpic

    Your IP address will be recorded 

    When you submit the form an invisible reCAPTCHA check will be performed.
    You must follow the Privacy Policy and Google Terms of use.